ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Randomize
