I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
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