16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Randomize
