I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize
