whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize
