we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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