Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
