Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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