He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
