I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
he had hair everywhere except his balls
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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