Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
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