Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
