So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize