did you get engaged???
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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