yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
he thought i was a dude.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Randomize
