We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Please, let me fuck your mom
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
