She said her name was "party"
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize