I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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