Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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