I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
