I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
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