wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I need to stop coming to work sober
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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