O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
