I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
