she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
