His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
