i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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