in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
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