made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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