The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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