Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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