am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Randomize
