I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
