why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Randomize
