GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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