I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
my being single is dangerous.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
