I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I need moral support for this bender
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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