I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
