She went from zero to smokin in five shots
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
is that a dick in a sweater?
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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