the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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