let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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