Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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