thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
they need to just BURY HIM!
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
