i think my tv is drunk
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
