No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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