I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
