you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I want a musical about memes.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
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