therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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