my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
How many fucks given?
0.12846
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
