what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
