Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
