he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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